Sunday, July 27, 2014

BINARY : LIMA



LIMA

Ayen menghempas beg galas ke sofa. Seterusnya badannya pula. Lecture seterusnya lagi empat jam. Biasanya dia akan lepak di apartment Wawa. Nak diharap dia yang menghabiskan empat jam di library menunggu lecture seterusnya memang mustahil la.

Wawa di lab mungkin. Fikiran separa sedar menuturkan.

Remote controller televisyen dicapai. Terus jari menekan-nekan butang mencari mana-mana program yang boleh lekat dengan mata.

The very beginning of the ayah, Siraat al-lathina, Allah makes us describes the previous people who were successful in crossing the straight, long, difficult journey upwards to Allah…”

Ayen mengangkat kening. Wawa dalam bilik ke? 

“…which subtly shows that the real role models of Islam are not the ones who are still alive, rather the ones who are gone. The graduation ceremony is death. We ask Allah to show us the path of those who have graduated from this life successfully.”

Jari masih lagi menekan-nekan butang pada remote controller. Kepala disandarkan pada kusyen sofa. Tak tergerak nak menjenguk bilik Wawa.

“The next part, ‘an’amta alayhim, is interesting. The word ‘an’ama comes from nu’uma, which refers to softness/relaxed state. It is no coincidence that cows and sheep are called an’aam in Arabic. The relation is that cows and sheep when they move are very relaxed, unlike a tense animal such as a cat. Remember that Allah described this path as a hard path and the tasks as difficult task, and that the higher up the ladder one goes, the harder it becomes to stay there and keep climbing. But Allah then says that the ones who succeed this stage are those upon whom relaxation is bestowed, they are now calm.”

Suara itu sekadar samar-samar kedengaran, namun setiap patah jelas. Volume televisyen diperlahankan.

Ghayri almaghdubi alayhim’ is commonly translated as ‘not the path of those who earn your wrath’ or the like. However, this phrase doesn’t even contain the pronoun ‘your’ and that has greater implications than just a grammatical pattern. Allah does not mention His name to the extent that He does not want His name mentioned anywhere near those whom His anger is thrown upon them.”

“Wawa...” Ayen memanggil. Derap langkah dibawa ke arah bilik Wawa.

And ad-daalleen is usually translated as, ‘those who go astray’. Perhaps a more common contextual translation would describe them as people who are lost. While this is a lesser degree of failure than having everyone’s anger flung at you, it is still failure as they did not get Allah’s guidance."

Daun pintu bilik Wawa dikuak. Ayen menjenguk ke dalam bilik.

“Ayen?” butang pause pada keyboard ditekan. Suara tadi terhenti. Wawa menarik pandang dari skrin laptop. “Laa..kenapa datang tak bagitahu?”

“Aku minta access daripada Nasuha.”

“Nak makan?”

Ayen mengangguk.

“Lauk kat atas meja. Aku dah panaskan lauk dengan nasi.”

Ayen lagi sekali mengangguk. Otak makin ligat mentafsir perkara yang lain selain lauk dengan nasi yang dah dipanaskan.

Butang play pada keyboard ditekan. Lecture kembali bermula.

“And again, in this very last ayah, we vow asking guidance from Him, yet we treat al-Fatihah just like some sort of a subconscious mumble?”


***


Ayen meletakkan wireless headphone di telinga. Namun, suara Jacoby Shaddix yang memekak di telinga langsung tidak masuk ke otak.

“And again, in this very last ayah, we vow asking guidance from Him, yet we treat al-Fatihah just like some sort of a subconscious mumble?"

Terus wajah Wawa bertandang ke fikiran. Haishhh… kepala yang tidak gatal digaru-garu. Apa dah jadi dengan Wawa?

Pertama, makan dalam lif. Mungkin normal kalau nak makan duduk, angkat tangan tadah doa. Tapi...

Yang tu pertama. Tak masuk cerita kedua, semalam, yang dia sendiri ternampak Wawa dengar lecture daripada sheikh mana entah dari laman Youtube. Lecture tentang al-Fatihah mungkin.

Dan ketiga. Dan seterusnya...
Banyak. Sangat banyak. Mungkin berkajang kalau nak disenaraikan semua.

Wawa dah jadi...
…pelik.

Apa dah jadi dengan kau Wawa?

Kepala digeleng berkali-kali. Keluh dihela panjang. Cemburu ke? Atau mungkin sebab Ayen sendiri rasa dia ketinggalan.

Jujur, dia tak selesa dengan keadaan Wawa yang sekarang.

Dan apa dah jadi dengan aku?

***

Wawa menanggalkan cermin mata. Hujung pangkal hidung dipicit dengan dua jari. Pening kian terasa sebaik keluar daripada Science Building. Bahang mentari mungkin.

Langkahan pun jadi terhuyung-hayang. Seketika, tangan meraba menggapai mana-mana objek.

Sekeliling terasa seakan berputar. Mata dah mula berpinar. Apa dah jadi nih?

“Wawa!”

Mata Wawa dalam pinar terus mencari arah suara. Kak Jue… suaranya terlekat di kerongkong.

***

“Ayen!”

Nadhiya yang baru sahaja masuk ke dalam lab menyapa. Ayen automatik berpaling.

“Wawa blacked out!”


[Binary : Lima]
Jujur,
Membesar itu menyesakkan
Mendewasa itu perit
Habiburrahim





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